I just found out that I am going to be an Aunt! Auntie Wendy...cool. My sister-in-law is three months pregnant so it is still early days. Hope the rest of the pregnancy goes smoothly. I suddenly feel really old. Not old as in I feel decrepit, but I feel like I'm entering a definite stage of life where people get married, people start having kids. When I was young I would imagine my siblings getting married and I remember thinking how distant in the future those events were.
Trying not to worry about the mountain of stuff I need to do upon my return to the States, and take in my last few days here.
Monday, July 30, 2012
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Surgery date set
Waited with Maria at Club de Leones again this morning, this
time for a relatively short 4 hours. As anticipated, her health stats are fine
so we went ahead and scheduled the surgery for 8 Aug, 8am (I told Maria this
was an easy time/date to remember 8/8 8am, but she doesn’t do dates very well
so she didn’t get it). As I’ve mentioned Maria can be quite exasperating at
times, unintentionally. She was worried that she had high blood pressure, that
she would be too nervous and shaky for the surgery because she is afraid and
because she would be stressed out after having to attend to so many people
staying at the house the week before…and then the 8th might not be
good because she would be tired and nervous from the week before etc etc. Maria
is very childlike, both physically and personality-wise. Most of the time it is
refreshing, but during times like this I just want to sit her down and say,
“Look, just do the goddamn surgery asap”. It has been tricky balancing being
stern enough about getting the surgery and all the preparations for it done,
for Maria’s sake and because I’m paying and want to make sure my money is going
to its intended purpose, and also being forgiving enough and tolerant of things
like her fears and nerves; they are her eyes after all. I think I am not very
tolerant/patient with people who scare easily and/or get scared over things not
worth being scared about. Because my pain threshold has always been high, and
made higher by my accident and recovery, I’ve never been very sympathetic to
people’s physical pain or fear of pain. But I’ve had to be very patient with
Maria because she isn’t educated enough to understand a lot of things, and
because of my limited Spanish. Maria’s eyes were very sensitive to the sun
after the consultation on Tuesday and she was freaking out fearing she was
going blind. But because I couldn’t say in Spanish “your eyes are very
sensitive to sunlight because the doctor dilated your pupils; you aren’t going
blind”, I had to just reassure her that the situation was temporary, she wasn’t
going blind, and she would be fine in half and hour or so.
Maria is going to need three surgeries in total, spaced
about a month apart. The first surgery will be on her left eye where there is
on big carnosidad obscuring her
iris/pupil. The second surgery will be on one of the carnosidades in her right eye; the third surgery on the second carnosidades in her right eye. Obviously,
this increases her medical costs, but I’ll cover that.
The doctor said only 3 days are required for her recovery,
but Maria is paranoid and wants to take off 15 days! This means she will miss
45 days of work for her three surgeries. She hasn’t been paid for any vacation
days since she has worked for Acxa so I don’t blame her for wanting to take this
extra time off, especially since I know Acxa will work her to the bone when she
returns to work and won’t make any exceptions for something as trivial as, oh,
I don’t know, eye-surgery?
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Tired and exasperated
I love Maria like one loves a 2-year old child. She can be so exasperating at times...she's a bit of a hypochondriac and I'm trying to reassure her that she isn't diabetic (she walks 2-3 miles a day, eats well, and is thin).
Went with Maria to get blood work done this morning. Again, a lot of waiting. I cannot wait to get back to the US and have people meet me ON TIME again.
Update: Yet again, the slug known as Acxa, has stalled our surgery
plans. I had missed all my classes so that I could get all these appointments
for Maria attended to, and to have the first surgery before I depart next Wed.
The doctor had said that if Maria’s tests turn out okay (which they are – I
collected the lab results this morning) she could have the surgery done next
Monday. Acxa has refused to let Maria take the day off on Monday on the grounds
that there are a bunch of new arrivals to the house. Bull-fucking-shit. Acxa
could easily hire a replacement for the day (there is a nice friend of Maria’s
who takes over for her when Maria is absent), or if she is indeed more than
just a vegetable, she could lift her finger and do something for once. She is a vegetable (I picture a giant gourd :))–
she doesn’t use her brain or body at all. She sleeps till 10a, goes to
“therapia” (i.e. massage) after breakfast, returns for a late lunch, naps in
the afternoon, watches TV the rest of the time until 1 am or so, then goes to
bed. Repeat.
After discussing things with Maria, we think it is best for
me not to confront Acxa about this and just let the surgery take place a week
later. I have assurances from Maria that she will do the surgery – my fear is
that Acxa will keep coming up with reasons to not let Maria take the day off
for her surgery. I will be calling Maria regularly after the operation (the
tentative date is 8 Aug).
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
What is a carnosidad?
Translated from http://www.elliseye.com/san-francisco/carnosidad.htm using GoogleTranslate. Maria's case is severe.
CarnosidadLa pterygium pterygium is a growth or meaty, wedge shaped, in the cornea of the eye. This high growth of connective tissue and usually starts at the corner and extends toward the center of the eye. An outgrowth or pterygium is the result of an abnormal growth process of the conjunctiva fleshy on the cornea.
CarnosidadLa conjunctiva is a thin transparent mucous membrane that lines the back of the eyelid and eyeball. The cornea is the transparent section of the eye which allows light to enter the eye. Because the cornea is transparent, what you see when looking at the cornea is the iris and pupil. The conjunctiva normally extends from the back of the lid over the entire surface. The flesh or pterygium occurs when growth begins to form fleshy conjunctiva over the cornea.
A fleshy or pterygium may grow large enough to cause vision problems.ada to sunlight (ultraviolet rays) and chronic irritation caused by the dry environment, appears to contribute to its development. The flesh or pterygium occurs more often in people who spend much time outdoors, and frequently exposed to sun, wind, dust or adverse weather conditions. Furthermore, the flesh or pterygia have a chance to grow three times more among men than among women.
What are the symptoms?
Symptoms of pterygium fleshiness or generally not serious, but can include blurred vision and eye irritation. Patients often complain of itching, burning and wants to scratch.
During periods of growth, the pterygium is swollen and shows a red. The pterygium tends to progress slowly and in many patients, stabilized without causing problems. However, if the pterygium grows over the center of the cornea, there is loss of vision.
What is the treatment for proud flesh?
In the initial period, when the discomfort is mild, you can use lubricating eye drops or artificial tears to prevent drying.
When the discomfort increase is necessary to remove the pterygium by surgery because you can change the shape of the cornea and affect vision significantly.
CarnosidadLa pterygium pterygium is a growth or meaty, wedge shaped, in the cornea of the eye. This high growth of connective tissue and usually starts at the corner and extends toward the center of the eye. An outgrowth or pterygium is the result of an abnormal growth process of the conjunctiva fleshy on the cornea.
CarnosidadLa conjunctiva is a thin transparent mucous membrane that lines the back of the eyelid and eyeball. The cornea is the transparent section of the eye which allows light to enter the eye. Because the cornea is transparent, what you see when looking at the cornea is the iris and pupil. The conjunctiva normally extends from the back of the lid over the entire surface. The flesh or pterygium occurs when growth begins to form fleshy conjunctiva over the cornea.
A fleshy or pterygium may grow large enough to cause vision problems.ada to sunlight (ultraviolet rays) and chronic irritation caused by the dry environment, appears to contribute to its development. The flesh or pterygium occurs more often in people who spend much time outdoors, and frequently exposed to sun, wind, dust or adverse weather conditions. Furthermore, the flesh or pterygia have a chance to grow three times more among men than among women.
What are the symptoms?
Symptoms of pterygium fleshiness or generally not serious, but can include blurred vision and eye irritation. Patients often complain of itching, burning and wants to scratch.
During periods of growth, the pterygium is swollen and shows a red. The pterygium tends to progress slowly and in many patients, stabilized without causing problems. However, if the pterygium grows over the center of the cornea, there is loss of vision.
What is the treatment for proud flesh?
In the initial period, when the discomfort is mild, you can use lubricating eye drops or artificial tears to prevent drying.
When the discomfort increase is necessary to remove the pterygium by surgery because you can change the shape of the cornea and affect vision significantly.
Finally...some news + no more donations needed
Finally, some concrete news re. Maria and her eyes. I know a lot of you are as eager to get some firm news as I am. My day went like this (you will notice a common theme):
6.30am: Arrive at the Club de Leones (I only made the connection to the Lion's Club this morning) to wait in line outside the building
7am: Door open. Wait on benches to get a number. Get #11. Wait to pay for consult.
8am: Start taking in patients to pay for consult. Wait some more.
9am: Pay for consult. Back to benches to wait
10.30am: See Doctor
10.30-12 noon: Mix of waiting and being seen by doctor.
12 noon: Go to lab to inquire whether they are open tomorrow (it is a public holiday). They are.
The news:
The carnosidad(es) in both eyes are very large and need to be operated on asap. One eye is looking okay to be operated on, the other is too inflamed and the inflammation needs to die down before that eye can be operated on otherwise there is too much bleeding. In spite of the waiting, I was pleased with the attention and service Maria received at this subsidized clinic for the poor/those who can't afford private care. The consult was the same as she would have received in the private clinic so I cancelled that appointment, especially since the same doctors work at this clinic and the private one we had an appointment at. Maria received her consult for 35Q (~5 USD)!!
Next steps:
We are going to the laboratory tomorrow morning to get various tests done to make sure that Maria is healthy enough for the surgery. We will return with the lab results to Club de Leones on Thursday, and probably wait some more. If the results are all right, Maria can go to Guatemala City on Monday for the surgery.
The cost:
Surgery: 1200 Q
Consults: 200 Q
Lab: 120 Q
Pay forfeited due to absence: 1000Q
Glasses after surgery: 1000 Q
Medicine: not sure but I am guessing it will be around 500Q
Eye-sight: Priceless
Total: ~$520 USD ---- this is MUCH less than I thought it would cost. This is because I thought we would be going through the private route, but it turns out that the public option is just as good and the surgery can be arranged quickly as well.
As a result, I do not need any more donations. THANK YOU so much to everyone who has donated. I have received $750 in donations, and am putting in quite a bit myself, so any extra will go towards Maria's much needed house repairs.
More on what exactly Maria's condition is in my next post.
6.30am: Arrive at the Club de Leones (I only made the connection to the Lion's Club this morning) to wait in line outside the building
7am: Door open. Wait on benches to get a number. Get #11. Wait to pay for consult.
8am: Start taking in patients to pay for consult. Wait some more.
9am: Pay for consult. Back to benches to wait
10.30am: See Doctor
10.30-12 noon: Mix of waiting and being seen by doctor.
12 noon: Go to lab to inquire whether they are open tomorrow (it is a public holiday). They are.
The news:
The carnosidad(es) in both eyes are very large and need to be operated on asap. One eye is looking okay to be operated on, the other is too inflamed and the inflammation needs to die down before that eye can be operated on otherwise there is too much bleeding. In spite of the waiting, I was pleased with the attention and service Maria received at this subsidized clinic for the poor/those who can't afford private care. The consult was the same as she would have received in the private clinic so I cancelled that appointment, especially since the same doctors work at this clinic and the private one we had an appointment at. Maria received her consult for 35Q (~5 USD)!!
Next steps:
We are going to the laboratory tomorrow morning to get various tests done to make sure that Maria is healthy enough for the surgery. We will return with the lab results to Club de Leones on Thursday, and probably wait some more. If the results are all right, Maria can go to Guatemala City on Monday for the surgery.
The cost:
Surgery: 1200 Q
Consults: 200 Q
Lab: 120 Q
Pay forfeited due to absence: 1000Q
Glasses after surgery: 1000 Q
Medicine: not sure but I am guessing it will be around 500Q
Eye-sight: Priceless
Total: ~$520 USD ---- this is MUCH less than I thought it would cost. This is because I thought we would be going through the private route, but it turns out that the public option is just as good and the surgery can be arranged quickly as well.
As a result, I do not need any more donations. THANK YOU so much to everyone who has donated. I have received $750 in donations, and am putting in quite a bit myself, so any extra will go towards Maria's much needed house repairs.
More on what exactly Maria's condition is in my next post.
Monday, July 23, 2012
Climbing
A non-Maria post for a change...
There are many nights I stay awake, thinking about climbing
again. I often think about how I would climb a crack with one leg, jumar up a
rope with my left leg dangling out, perhaps inelegantly hobbling up a 5.6. Sometimes I get really fired up, but
a lot of the time I think about how I would inevitably compare myself to my
climbing-self before my accident, and then fall into sadness. I am soooo far
from being in shape, let alone climbing shape that I need to work off all those
tortillas and other foods I consumed in excess here, first. My body’s
metabolism is so messed up, which makes losing weight difficult for me. I think
because I lost so much weight after my surgeries and during my recuperation, my
body isn’t willing to lose all those extra pounds that it regained, fearing
another famine. Or maybe I’m just completely kidding myself. With the exception
of my really tight, toe-curling climbing shoes and a backpack, I haven’t sold
any of my climbing gear. I imagine placing a cam (a nice BD #2) securely in a
crack, clipping the rope in for the first time, and imagine how I might feel.
Triumphant? Sad? Will I be able to enjoy just being outside again? Or will I be
too mired in my past and current physical state to enjoy the experience? I’m
not sure if I am ready to find out. Being in Boston might also provide a
disincentive to climb on New England rock in New England weather.
I also think about the ethics of introducing my children,
should I have any, to climbing. Part of me can’t imagine anything more fun and
rewarding than sharing with your child a sport that can give you such a
richness of experience. Another part of me wonders, given the risks and what
happened to me, is it ethical for me to get my kids into climbing? I often
imagine having a bad-ass little girl who will compete in the X-Games, but
again, would I be a responsible parent for encouraging her to do so?
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Proud
I am so proud of Maria. We met at 7am this morning (Wed) to be the first people in line for the bank opening at 7.30am. My role was to help Maria with any writing and/or reading she might have to do, and also provide the money to deposit. I had asked Maria if she knew how to write/sign her name, and she didn't. I thought, and was told, that this would not be an issue; Maria could use her thumbprint as her signature. Anyway, we got to the bank and encountered a few obstacles. First, Maria's identification was so old that it was hard to make out the letters of her name. Second, Maria needed to be able to sign her name on a few documents.
Now, Maria has never held a pen let alone tried to write anything before this. I wrote out her name (I shortened it considerably, from Maria Dolores Aspuac Velasquez to Maria Aspuac) and asked her to copy it and practice a few times. She gingerly held the pen, her hand shaking out of nervousness, but after quite a few tries, she was able to write her name legibly enough to suffice. I was/am so proud of her. It must have taken so much courage to write for the very first time, at 50 years old, in a situation where a lot of pressure was being put on her. I feel like a proud mama, even though she is the one that is old enough to be my mother.
The earliest time when both Maria is able to take time off work and when the doctor is available is this coming Tuesday. I set up an appointment. We will also be going to the public hospital where the same doctor works and make inquiries (i.e. wait for a couple of hours before being seen).
Now, Maria has never held a pen let alone tried to write anything before this. I wrote out her name (I shortened it considerably, from Maria Dolores Aspuac Velasquez to Maria Aspuac) and asked her to copy it and practice a few times. She gingerly held the pen, her hand shaking out of nervousness, but after quite a few tries, she was able to write her name legibly enough to suffice. I was/am so proud of her. It must have taken so much courage to write for the very first time, at 50 years old, in a situation where a lot of pressure was being put on her. I feel like a proud mama, even though she is the one that is old enough to be my mother.
The earliest time when both Maria is able to take time off work and when the doctor is available is this coming Tuesday. I set up an appointment. We will also be going to the public hospital where the same doctor works and make inquiries (i.e. wait for a couple of hours before being seen).
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